We all need encouragement and kids of divorce need encouragement more than your realize. They need it from married couples, coaches, teachers, pastors, most of all from you. It seems like kids of divorce often live in isolation, have confusion about family structures, have a self-image of being “less”, and may be emotionally withdrawn…on the INSIDE. Perhaps on the OUTSIDE they may look fine. “Studies show that how kids fare in the aftermath of divorce depends, in part, on the amount of support they receive from significant adults in their lives.” Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll. In addition to their parents, it includes extended family, friends and schools. Therefore you can make significant difference by following these 5 simple ways to encourage kids of divorce.
They are your kids friends or classmates, on your kids or grandkids sports teams, in your church, in your classroom, on your team…just know who they are. This is the first step.
Talk to them.
Look them in the eyes, ask them questions and have a conversation. Perhaps even listen to what they say. Kids of divorce often feel like they do not have a voice, with so many things our of their control.
Invite them to your home for dinner or take them on a family outing or activity. Kids of divorce need to experience family life that is different from their own.
Offer to pick them up for or take them home after school or activities. While this is a tremendous act of kindness for the parent, it lets the child know that they are noticed and important in your eyes.
Having a special place in your heart for a child of divorce begins to build an ongoing relationship with them. Consistency over time helps kids of divorce heal and your attention gives them encouragement and hope for the future.